The Best Handful of Tips 94 – Listen Carefully:

Learn to listen carefully. Leaders who listen to their people are the most effective as well as the most popular.

You cannot listen if you are talking – and if you are talking you are not learning about things that could be of interest or concern.

The five best tips to help improve your listening skills

1. First, establish a rapport

Prepare to listen. If possible, find a quiet place free from distractions. Close the window. Shut the door.

Aim to put the speaker at ease. Start with a friendly chat and try to establish a rapport. “How is your family.” “Have you had a good day?” “How is your week going?”etc.

2. Concentrate on the speaker

Give the speaker your full attention. Turn off your cell phone. Disregard the papers on your desk. Keep looking at the person. Smile!

Concentrate and show you are listening by nodding and making encouraging noises. “Um, I see what you mean.”

Listen to the tone of what is being said and look at the person’s facial expressions and  body language.

3. Be patient – don’t interrupt

Hear the speaker out first. Don’t argue or jump to any conclusions. 

Refrain from giving your own or views.

4. Draw the speaker out

Encourage the speaker by asking simple open- ended questions. Try to draw the speaker out. “Why did you say that? Is that how you really feel about things?” 

5. Summarise, review and reflect

From time to time try to summarise what you believe the speaker said and recall some of the speaker’s words. This will help you both remember what was said.

A good listener is popular socially and learns a lot more than most people.

Geoffrey Moss, mossassociates.co.nz

“You will please people more by listening to them than talking to them.”

Source: “Persuasive Ways. ‘Tricks of the trade’ to get your ideas across”. First published by  Moss Associates Ltd., New Zealand and in Chinese by the Shanghai People’s Publishing House, the Singapore Institute of Management, Kogan Page Ltd, U.K and in Hungarian by Bagolyvar Konyvkiado.  Also published as the “Secrets of Persuasion” by Cengage Learning Asia and as an e-book and sold by Amazon.com.