Improve Your Communication Skills

         Reading completes a person; speech trains them for the job; writing teaches accurate expression.

         This year make a special effort to improve your communication skills – don’t take them for granted. This is the first of several blogs on this complex topic.

         Have you noticed our electronic servants are fast becoming our masters? Unless you take control of your time you will be handicapped in your career.

         There’s the time needed for planning, time for talking to clients, colleagues, and family, time for networking, and time for doing things – so take care to allow time for all of them.

         Communication is a complex subject and depends on many things apart from the message you are trying to send.

         Your body language is important. What nationally you are, and whether English is your primary language. The way you dress can be important. Even the tone of your voice.

         Being able to make a convincing presentation for a loan, a job or a business deal is becoming increasingly important for success in today’s competitive climate.

         If it’s possible, the best way to communicate is face-to-face.

A Handful of Tips to help you improve your questioning  skills

Ask questions and listen

         To start a conversation with a stranger you look at a person, you smile and you start with a neutral topic such as the weather or, “Have you lived around here for long?”, type of question.

         It’s important to ask the right open-ended question to get the conversation started. Once you have discovered common ground a rapport can be established and a discussion follows.

Ask open-ended questions

         Learn to ask ‘comfortable’ questions to put people at ease before you seek the information you require.  “Have you had a good year?” “Where were you schooled?”

Ask simple questions

         It is surprising how much you can learn by asking basic questions like;  Who? What? When? Where? Why? Why not? How? and How much?

Ask ‘suppose’ Questions

         “Suppose you were appointed to be the head of the department. What changes would you make?”

Try ‘probe’ questions

         Try picking up keywords from what the person said and ask for further amplification. “You said you were not happy working here. Why is that?”

“Why did you ask that question?”

“You implied we could do better – how could we?”

Ask ‘agreement’ questions

         “I understand what you are saying. How would it be if we tried giving you a chance to try that job?

Put the speaker at ease     

         Give the speaker your full attention and make an effort to put them at ease.

Show you are listening

         Look and act as if you are interested. Show you are listening by nodding if you agree.

         Make encouraging noises, “Mmm, I see what you mean. I believe you may have misunderstood what I said.”

Empathise with the speaker

         Try to put yourself in the other’s point of view. Don’t assume that they understand your point of view.

         Take care not to let your feelings distort your message. If you become emotional you will not hear properly.

         Try not to defend or attack the speaker.

         If you put the speaker on the defensive they may ‘clam up’ or get emotional. 

         Avoid an argument if you want facts and useful information.

Geoffrey Moss (mossassociates.co.nz)

“Without the right question, you will never get the right answer.”